i say those words because im trying hard to convince myself that im just thinking too much into things and also to stop myself frm sinking too deep. i do not want to paint such a beautiful picture for myself, just to find that all is just a dream. or that im just in a game.
没有希望就不会有失望吗? but at times it feels too real to be a dream. yet other times it feels too good to be real. i cant explain y im resisting but... but... it is placing me in a real dilemma. there are times when i... i actually hope that things wld revert to the previous status cos it shld be easier that way but selfish of me. then can just leave me to heal myself with time. however, i contradict myself by hoping the status quo can last as long as possible.
isit cos i care too much thats y im so confused? or.. im just... afraid to find out it might be a bubble that will burst anytime? y isit so hard to control yet im afraid to lose it?
ugh.. full of mao duns. m i even thinking straight?
died off at 15:57;
me
sagittarius
stoner
<3 patrick star
<3 black
<3 mini coopers
music = life
x japan #1
